Hon! Stuff

I have had hundreds of requests for my exclusive brand of clothing and other items.

Up to now, I have resisted such requests because I didn't want to commercialise or devalue what is collectively referred to as The Hon. However, I have reconsidered, and now I feel that I have been selfish in my denial of these requests, and, therefore, today I present to you the Grand Opening of The Hon's On-Line Emporium

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The Worst Day Ever!

Yesterday I promised to post Amanda’s story she calls 'The Worst Day Ever'.
So here it is, in her own words.

The Worst Day Ever!
Okay! This might be weird, but Daddy told me to write it.
Today at school we smelled poopie! I looked in front of me. No poopie. So I looked behind me. Yes! Poopie!
(I had to ask Daddy how to spell 'poopie', since it has not been one of my spelling words. He said if it's a boy it's 'poopy' and if it's a girl it's 'poopie'.
Since I didn't know if it was a boy or a girl, I just spelled it 'poopie'.)
I raised my hand and said, "It is an emergency!”
When Mrs. McCorkle heard that, it didn’t take her one second to ask, "What?"! I said, "There is poopie on the floor!”
She said, “WHAT?”, so I repeated, “There is poopie on the floor!” She got out of her chair and asked, “Are you sure it’s poopie?”
I answered, “Yes ma’am. It LOOKS like poopie. It SMELLS like poopie! It IS poopie!"

Mrs. McCorkle called the office and said, “I need Mrs. Cordell to step into the second grade as soon as possible!” When Mrs. Cordell came, she asked, “What is the problem?”
Mrs. McCorkle said, “There is poopie on the floor!”
Mrs. Cordell said, “WHAT?”, and Mrs. McCorkle repeated, “There is poopie on the floor!” Mrs. Cordell asked, “Are you sure it’s poopie?”
Mrs. McCorkle answered, “Yes ma’am. It LOOKS like poopie. It SMELLS like poopie! It IS poopie!"

Mrs. Cordell then said to Mason, “Lift up your shoes.” Then they took him to the office for about ten or fifteen minutes.
THE END
By Amanda Jean Xinzhi Cross

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So there you have it, 'The Worst Day Ever'.
I have decided that this will be the only poopie story that I will ever post. Any other poopie stories will have to be posted in another blog that caters to poopie stories.

Daddy said when he was little they had to ride in a carpool. He said that Marty would get poopie on his shoes before he got in the car almost every day! If his mom was driving the carpool that day, she would make him get out and try to get it off. If Aunt Beth was driving, she wouldn’t let him get in until he had been
‘poopie checked’.

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KFC Cake

As promised, here is the cake recipe. I only took this picture after I tasted it, because, to be perfectly honest, I didn't think it was going to turn out to be very good!




Rachel was coming over for supper, and Mommy thought we should have a dessert. All we had was one yellow cake mix, a can of pineapple, and a can of mandarin oranges.

I dont know if you have ever seen the book by Anne Byrn, called The Cake Mix Doctor, but it is a treasure. Check out her blog, HERE.

I spent a little time in the index looking for recipes that use a yellow cake mix. This one, called Finger Lickin' Good Cake, did not contain ANY
KFC, but it did use the yellow cake mix, the pineapple, and the oranges!

This cake is super moist and delicious.

CAKE
1 Plain Yellow Cake mix
1 Can (11 ounces) Mandarin Oranges (undrained)
1 Stick of Butter, melted
1/4 Cup Oil
4 Large Eggs

TOPPING
1 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon almond extract
Juice from one 8 ounce can of Pineapples

Mix all CAKE ingredients in a large mixing bowl.
Blend for one minute on low to combine.
Stop mixer and scrape down the sides of the bowl.
Blend an additional 2-3 minutes on medium until well blended. The oranges should be broken up into the batter.

Pour into a greased and floured cake pan and bake at 350 for about an hour.
Cool for 10 minutes, and then turn the cake onto a plate.

Combine the sugar, almond extract, and pineapple juice in a small sauce pan.
Bring to a boil, and then reduce the heat.
Cook until thickened, slightly.
Cool completely.

With a skewer or toothpick, poke holes all over the cake.
Drizzle the topping over the cake slowly to allow it to seep into the holes.

That's it. You could, I suppose, use crushed pineapple, and mix it with the topping. We decided, however, to eat the pineapple while the cake was cooking!

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We had exams this week and I made a 90 on my English exam!

Now, I want to talk to you today about tacky Halloween décor. Yes, Halloween decorations!
As I rode with my brother Sunday night to take Rachel home, we rode by a house that had a Christmas tree in the window! Also, right across the street from Rachel’s house were orange lights strung over a bush!
Please, dont be like these tacky people, but if you already are please send pictures!!!

I would also like to tell you that during the Christmas season, we (as in Daddy and me) plan to take pictures of the tackiest Christmas decoration houses.
You will have an opportunity to choose one everyday as the tackiest house in town!
Homes that are still decorated from last year will still be qualified since leaving the decorations up for extended periods count extra in tacky points!!!

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Yesterday, Amanda came home and had to tell us all about poopie in her classroom. That's right, I said POOPIE!!! The story went on forever, so Daddy asked her to write it down. She did, and we have it ready to publish on tomorrow's blog!
I'd publish it today, but that would ruin the anticipation, and I've already run long today!

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Hon's Story Time

It's been a while since I've had any really good stuff to blog about. There was this really good cake recipe that turned out way better than expected, so I think I'll share that with you tomorrow.

If you've read my blog for any time, you know that I have a fondness for stories. While I enjoy the stories I post here, I doubt that they are entirely true. Daddy usually picks the ones that he thinks are the most touching, however, I think they may involve a small amount of imagination.

Today I want to tell you story that is both completely factual, and touching at the same time! I often enjoy what I like to refer to as the 'back-story', or the story behind the story. A sort of 'the rest of the story', if you will.

I was reminded of this story at church yesterday, so I decided to share it. This story is about a man named Horatio G. Spafford who was a lawyer in Chicago in the 1800's. Horatio had invested much of his money into real estate in downtown Chicago. Well, I'm sure you can guess what happened. At about 9 pm on October 8, a cow, owned by a Mrs. O'Leary, kicked over a lantern, and started the shed where she was on fire. Actually, that part of the story was made up by the guy who wrote the story for the Chicago Republican because he thought it made more colourful copy! There is no doubt, however, that the fire did start in the O’Leary barn, based on the ruins left by the devastion. The actual cause will probably never be known, however, the Great Chicago Fire did start on that day, and burned until early Tuesday October 10, 1871!

There were a few buildings that did not get destroyed. The Chicago Water Tower was one of them. The principal reason was because the Water Tower was one of the few buildings that wasn't made out of wood. It was made out of limestone. Of course the fire ruined it a little but after the fire, workers made it even better than it had been before. That is why the Water Tower still stands today.

When the fire was over, 300 people of the 300,000 in Chicago were killed, 100,000 were left homeless, 17,500 buildings were destroyed, 73 miles of street were destroyed and $200 million of property was destroyed.

Horatio lost almost everything he owned that day. Still, for two years Spafford, who was a friend of the famous evangelist, Dwight Moody, assisted the homeless, impoverished, and grief-stricken ruined by the fire.

After two years of rebuilding, Horatio decided to take an extended vacation with his wife and four daughters in Europe. As they were preparing to leave, Horatio got caught up in some unexpected real estate business and could not leave on the day they were supposed to depart. Horatio sent his family on ahead of him, and planned to catch up to them in Paris.

Their ship, the Ville du Havre, never made it. Off Newfoundland, the Ville du Havre was rammed by the British iron sailing ship the Loch Earn, and sank within 20 minutes. Though Horatio's wife, Anna, was able to cling to a piece of floating wreckage and was one of only 47 survivors among hundreds, all four of their daughters, Maggie, Tanetta, Annie, and Bessie, drowned in the cold waters of the Atlantic.


Anna was picked up unconscious by the crew of the Loch Earn, which itself was in danger of sinking. Fortunately, the Trimountain, a cargo sailing vessel, arrived to save the survivors. Nine days after the shipwreck Anna landed in Cardiff, Wales, and sent Horatio a telegram stating, "Saved alone. What shall I do . . ."


A fellow survivor of the collision, Pastor Weiss, recalled Anna saying, "God gave me four daughters. Now they have been taken from me. Someday I will understand why."

After receiving Anna's telegram, Horatio immediately left Chicago to bring his wife home. When the two finally met up with each other, Dwight Moody was also present. "It is well," Spafford told him quietly. "The will of God be done."

On the Atlantic crossing home, the captain of his ship called Horatio to his cabin to tell him that they were passing over the spot where his four daughters had perished. He wrote to Rachel, his wife's half-sister, "On Thursday last we passed over the spot where she went down, in mid-ocean, the waters three miles deep. But I do not think of our dear ones there. They are safe, folded, the dear lambs."

The Holy Spirit inspired Horatio to write the following as he passed over their watery grave, which I think you will recognise:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain

It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

Refrain

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

Refrain

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll,
No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

Refrain

But, Lord, ‘tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
Oh trump of the angel! Oh voice of the Lord!
Blessèd hope, blessèd rest of my soul!

Refrain

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Refrain

The name of this hymn is Ville du Havre, but we know it today as It is Well with My Soul.

And that, as Paul Harvey would say, is the rest of the story.

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Have you met Fire Dog?

Me and Fire Dog

Saturday was some kind of Fire Prevention thing, so they had this big Fire Prevention Thing Expo at the Wal-Mart parking lot. Founder's had a tent and Mommy was working there.

At the Founder's tent, they were giving away popcorn in little Founder's buckets (some people call them pails, but I call them buckets), and bubbles. Daniel the Spaniel was there, too, so I got my picture with him....

This cat aint got a smile in him!


Every fire truck and fire rescue thing in Lancaster was there! I hope nothing happened where they would have needed help! They took two ladder trucks and raised the ladders all the way up and hung a flag at the top....

There was a man up there throwing Chick-Fil-A cows to us....


We went in this trailer to learn about what to do if you house catches on fire...


So the smoke starts coming in....


We had to learn to go backwards down the stairs and stay low to get out...


Jaden just closed her eyes and froze!
Daddy had to go get her!
I think she thought it was real!!!

This is me with my new fire truck!


See y'all tomorrow!

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Nyam de Yams

"Mus tek cyear a de root fa heal de tree." -- Gullah proverb

I have been after Daddy for weeks to get us the stuff we need to make a Sweet Potato Pie.
Last night he obliged, so what follows is Hon's Sweet Potato Pie.

I wanted something simple, so I used the recipe on the side of the can.

All you need is:
1 29 oz can of Bruce's Sweet potato Pie Filling

We ONLY use Bruce's since it's a real Southron company, and the product is of the highest quality. They say they only use the most tender part of the potato, called the 'sweetheart'. It's already the perfect consistency, colour, and no strings or lumps.

2 Large Eggs
2/3 cup Evaporated Milk
1 Deep-Dish Frozen Pie Shell


I'm not a nutritional anthropologist, but I figure that since sweet potatoes were such an integral part of the Gullah diet, that this pie must have some connection to that culture. Therefore, we thought it only fitting that we keep a copy of the Gullah New Testament, De Nyew Testament by our side.

Pray like dis yah, say, 'We Fada wa dey een heaben, leh ebrybody hona ya name. We pray dat soon ya gwine rule oba da wol. Wasoneba ting ya wahn, leh um be so een dis wol same like dey in heaben. Gii we de food wa we need dis day ya an ebry day.'

De Good Nyews Bout Jedus Christ Wa Matthew write 6:9-11

Put all the ingredients into the mixing bowl, and stir it all up real good.

Now pour it all into the pie shell.

Bake in a 425 degree oven for 15 minutes, then reduce the fire to 350 and rock on for another 50 minutes.
When all is said and done, it should look like this.

If you have a piece of fine Minton china in the Jasmine pattern, you can use it here.

This pie has a true sweet potato texture and flavour. If you're more inclined for the more custardy texture, you may need to add some more egg and milk. Let me know, Daddy has a recipe with buttermilk that'll suit you just fine!

Enjoy!
~Hon!

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As requested...
Sweet Potato Pie II

• 1 deep dish, unbaked pie crust
• 2 cups cooked and mashed sweet potatoes
• 2 tablespoons butter, softened
• 2 eggs, beaten
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup buttermilk
• 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• Cinnamon and Nutmeg (if desired)

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Mix together potatoes, butter, and eggs.
3. In another bowl, mix together sugar, flour, and salt.
4. Add spices.
5. Add to sweet potato mixture and stir well.
6. Mix together buttermilk and baking soda. Add to sweet potato mixture and stir well.
7. Mix in vanilla extract.
8. Pour filling into pastry shell.
9. Bake in preheated oven for 70 minutes, until set in centre.

It WILL rise up so dont fill the shell too full, and make sure you place a cookie sheet underneath!

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This recipe is from my Spices of the World Cookbook, a paperback, which was a give-away with Corning ranges back in the early seventies. My Dad was a Corning dealer, and brought several home. It is, by far, my most used cookbook. Other than my 'show-off' cookbooks, it is the only one on the kitchen counter all the time!

Enjoy!
~Hon's Daddy!

Harvest Sunday

Remember to let us know your opinion for Daddy Blogs! The current tally is in the Update section of that post.

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Sunday we went to Grand-Mommy's church. She goes to First Baptist.
Daddy went there when he was little, and he and Mommy got married there by Roy Barnes. He was there Sunday, too. (Not that communist Roy Barnes from Georgia!)
This Roy Barnes was a charter member of the CenturyMen.


He's second from the right on the back row.

Sunday was Harvest Day, so a lot of people who used to go to church there but have moved away or now go to another church come back for a special day and dinner on the grounds.

Daddy said the very first one they had was when he was about 10 or 11, and was called Loyalty Day back then. It was a 'real' dinner on the grounds because everyone made something and brought it to church. There were about 1,000 people there, and they set up tables outside under the trees and everyone ate in the shade and had a rockin' good time eating and spinnin' yarns and drinkin' tea and such!

There were tables filled with cakes and pies, and about every kind of fried chicken there is. Some people brought hams or roast beef, and others had potato salad and green beans and creamed, boiled, mashed and twice-baked potatoes. There was six or eight different kinds of corn, butter beans, peas and other delicious vegetables like broccoli and asparagus.

The preacher had asked that all the ladies in the church that knew how to cook should please bring something. He said all the others should bring casseroles! And, boy, did they! There must have been three or four full tables of nothing but casseroles!
And then there was bread! Cornbread, muffins, rolls, loaves, and biscuits! There were even biscuits that already had ham in them! It was the best ever! A true feast of dinner on the grounds!
People that had moved away or were going to another church in town were thinking about moving home or transferring their letters back! Somebody should have thought to have an altar call right after that meal because there was sure to have been a few ready to be saved or rededicated!

That year it was such a success they decided to do it every year after that, um, but with a small change.
The next year NOBODY brought any food.

Somebody had a brilliant idea!
They said, "Let's get it all catered by Kentucky Fried Chicken! That way we wont have to be bothered with all that cooking and having to decide whether to eat ham or chicken or turkey!"
Another person slapped him on the back and said, "By jingy! That there's a splendid idea. That way our women wont have to be doing all that cooking and taking time away from all their chores at home! Yes sir! That yonder is one mighty fine idea, brother!"
So they all took a vote, and that's what they did, and the next year we all got a little box from the Colonel with a breast and a wing, cole slaw, mashed potatoes, and a biscuit. And we got a little package with one napkin, a package of salt and pepper, and a spork!

Now I'm not knockin' the Colonel. I think he has done a fine job with the recipe he and his nephew cooked up, it's just that you cant really expect the Colonel to come out favourably against the ladies of the church! (They used to be the BWU, but I dont know what they are now?) I mean, even if he made the best chicken in the world, how would it come out against a home-made red velvet cake or a roast turkey with sage dressing? It's just not a fair match-up.

Well, yesterday was not the first year's glory, but it certainly goes way past what was offered up that second year. Christine, one of the dear ladies at First Baptist, is responsible for cooking up a meal for the church every Wednesday night, and she was in charge of this year's menu.
There was ham and roast turkey, green beans, mac and cheese, cranberry sauce, rice and gravy, and red velvet or carrot cake, or cookies for dessert! It was all very good. So good , in fact, that I wont even mention the old hymns we sang to new tunes, or the old tunes we sang with new words that really confused and irritated Daddy in the worship service. (Hey! I got an idea...let's take this music and write our own words. I'm sure we can do better than Fanny Crosby!)
Keep in mind, too, that we had already been to early worship service at our church, so we got a double-dose of preachin'!


Daddy told Mommy that she had better pick out a pretty dress for Amanda to wear since she was going with us! Aunt Beth made this dress for my cousin Wendy, and then it got handed down to us. It'll be Jaden's next and then Jasmine's! It got Daddy's Seal of Approval®.



This is my food. Notice the mac and cheese takes up at least 25% of the plate! That orange stuff is sweet potato and it is 'off the bomb' as Amanda would say!


This is my Aunt/Cousin Wendy. She's my Aunt/Cousin because Daddy's sister, Aunt Beth is married to Mommy's daddy, so he is Uncle Paw-Paw! That sorta makes Wendy Mommy's sister.


This is Grand-Mommy and Aunt Beth. I think that cat behind them is the interim preacher.


This is Amanda eating her cookie. She said it was better than a Moe's cookie!


This is a horse and her colt we saw on the way home.


On the right is a good shot of the guy who thought it was a good idea to cater the dinner on the grounds from KFC, or the guy that put new words to the old hymns or old words to the new tunes!!!!!:-)

Peace out!
~Hon!

Daddy Blogs

Daddy has plenty to do, but he's loathe to do it. Therefore, I am allowing him a post today. Please show him the same level of courtesy and decorum that you have allowed me.
Thank You, ~Hon!

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Thank you Hon! I will endeavour to maintain the superior level or journalistic integrity and quality that we have all come to expect from your blog. I shall eschew exaggerated turns of speech that conceal mediocre affections: as if the fullness of the soul might not sometimes overflow in the emptiest of metaphors, since no one, ever, can give the exact measurements of his needs, nor of his conceptions, nor of his sufferings, and the human word is like a cracked cauldron upon which we beat out melodies fit for making bears dance when we are trying to move the stars to pity.
I am, as always, your humble serpent.

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Okay. Today as part of Daddy's Blog® , I want to solicit an opinion. I have attempted to get the opinion of my lovely and dearest spouse, however, she has turned a deaf ear to me as she realises that her opinion conveys consent, and that consent will most certainly require an expenditure of some yet unknown amount. She is, therefore, unwilling to offer any comment, so it is that I request the opinion of those who read this blog and, I trust, possess knowledge of what it is that will lend itself to our character and spirit.

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You see, there are three lovely young ladies.....



....and there are all these pretty dresses that one could choose to make gorgeous holiday photographs.....



...yet, the question remains, which dress goes with each girl?

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Hon, you may not comment as this is a solicitation for an opinion that I dont already know!

~Dad!

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October 8, update.

So far, the votes favour:

Hon and Mommy for the Hon.


Laura, for the Hon, and for Amanda and Jaden.

I have to admit that I had picked this burgundy one as my favourite for Amanda since this is her colour!

This one is one of Jaden's colours, but I like Laura's idea of getting them matching dresses.

Misty! Be more specific, 'cause a row in your browser isn't the same as a row in mine.
I'm still waiting for more family to chime in. Where are you guys????
How about you Krishna? Which one's do you like?